Familiar, Not Personal

If you’ve followed me for any length of time,
you know I was raised in a Christian home.

Some of my earliest memories are in a small church
my mom and dad started in North Dakota.

I can still see it.

Sitting on the piano bench beside my mom
while she played during services.
Watching my dad preach.

It was normal to me.
It was my world.

And if you had asked me back then,
I would have told you I was following Jesus.

I believed that.

I really did.

But if I’m being honest,
I wasn’t.

At least not in the way I thought.

At the risk of saying it too plainly,
I was following my parents.

Their faith.
Their discipline.
Their conviction.

I borrowed all of it.

And Jesus?

He felt real.
He just didn’t feel close.

More like a grandfather I respected
than a Savior I actually knew.

There was distance.

Not rebellion.
Not rejection.

Just distance.

And I didn’t even realize it.

Because everything around me said I was doing fine.

I knew the language.
Knew the rhythms.
Knew how it was supposed to look.

But knowing about Him
isn’t the same as walking with Him.

And borrowed faith
has a way of running out.

There came a point in my life
where what I had leaned on
wasn’t enough anymore.

My parents couldn’t carry it for me.
Their convictions couldn’t sustain me.

At some point,
everyone has to stand on their own two feet.

To walk in the path God has for them.
To walk with Jesus on their own.

And for the first time,
it got personal.

Not inherited.
Not assumed.

Mine.

That made me think...

How much of what I call faith
is actually mine?

And how much of it
have I just carried
because someone else handed it to me?

I’ve realized something.

There comes a moment
where trying to please everyone
starts pulling me away
from the only relationship that actually matters.

And maybe someone reading this
is standing right there.

Knowing it’s time.

Time to stop managing expectations.
Time to stop leaning on borrowed belief.
Time to step into something real.

Personal.

Not perfect.
Not polished.

Just real.

Because at the end of the day,
I’m not called to please everyone.

I’m called to walk with Him.

---

Subscribe:

One thought, every weekday morning, straight to your inbox for free!

If this resonated, share it with someone who might need it today.

#FirstLightBlog #FaithJourney #RealFaith #ChristianLiving #SpiritualGrowth #Truth