I am an apple fan. I love a good, crisp, sweet apple. I also enjoy a tart green apple dipped in caramel. And this time of year just isn’t complete without some great apple cider.
Don’t even get me started on homemade apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Preferably while the pie is still warm. That’s about as close to perfection as dessert gets.
But there is one thing I absolutely despise.
A soft, mushy apple.
You know the kind. It looks beautiful on the outside. Bright color. Perfect shape. You take a big bite, expecting that wonderful crunch, and instead you get something that feels like it’s been sitting in somebody’s refrigerator since Easter.
It’s a terrible disappointment.
But one thing is for sure. Just because every once in a while I bite into a mushy apple doesn’t mean I’m going to write off apples.
That would be ridiculous.
Yet I’ve witnessed that same pattern play out over and over again with people. We have an unpleasant experience with someone, and suddenly everyone who comes along afterward is treated with suspicion.
We make people pay for the sins of others in our past.
Someone breaks our trust, and the next person has to work twice as hard to earn it. Someone hurts us, and we build walls that even the best people struggle to get through. We have a bad experience at church, and before long we’ve decided the whole church is full of hypocrites.
And to be fair, there are some pretty mushy apples out there.
But there are also some wonderful people. Good people. People who genuinely care, who keep their word, who show up when life gets difficult. People who deserve to be known for who they are, rather than judged by whoever came before them.
Paul wrote, “Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” 1 Corinthians 13:7 (NKJV)
I don’t think that means we should blindly trust everyone. Experience ought to teach us something. But there’s a difference between learning from the past and allowing the past to make our decisions for us.
I wonder how many good relationships we’ve missed because we were still holding someone else accountable for an old disappointment.
A disappointing apple is still just one apple.
And I’m certainly not giving up apple pie.
First Light
www.firstlightblog.org
A daily reflection on faith, leadership, and life. One honest thought each morning to help start grounded, focused, and full of grace before the world even wakes up.
By Nathan Clark
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